Oh No Its Worse Than I Thought.....

.....and i'm not even talking about the weight gain ( i've been watching it bounce around for a month now so thats not a surprise), it's the fact the my last blog - so the last time i was focused on healthy living, was 9 months ago!!!

I posted today for the first time in ages in my fav 50+ thread and i mentioned that i did do many new things last year which is what i wanted and had in my signature.....
2010 - the year to try something new!
I got off my big butt and pretended i had courage coming out of my wazoo and enrolled in a course, which gave me the knowledge and skills to land my first ever job (apart from mothering of course). I've been working for 5 months now and i saw 5kgs drop off me (from the many i had put on) easily without even trying to be healthy.
I haven't been to the gym since i started my course because to put it simply i am just too damned tired after work - which i know will be helped by weightloss. I was waiting for a time when i would feel less tired by working to maybe get back to the gym and start watching what i eat but now that my body has gotten used to how much it moves around during the day i have put 3kgs back on and i'm only 4kgs lighter than my original starting weight........ so long the rest of my 23kg loss

I've been lurking around CK for a week but wasn't feeling ready to join in, however i'm not waiting anymore, i'll only get bigger if i do. It's time to start logging everything again.....even the bad stuff......no more burying my head in the sand. It's time ti focus on what i am doing/not doing to myself.

xoxo
Tham

mojo

~ONE day (one step) at a time.

~You (I) Can Do It!

>:D

mojo

~What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?
~ Anon

Oww Oww Oww

I learned something today.....I will never recommend 1 month off of healthy eating at the same time you have 1 month off of exercise. You end up 10 kilos heavier and out of breath before you get off the warm up bike (i hope i don't have to say that i wasn't recoomending that before anyway )
Ouch!
Ow for the soreness in my muscles now and ouch for the weight gain. I didn't think it was that much. (My scales died months ago and i was weighing in once a week at the gym)
My clothes are tight but i am still in a 22 so i didn't think it was that bad, and the one thing that goes through my head........24 weeks left of the year and i'm calculating with 20 for leeway so if i lose roughly 500g a week i will be at the same point i was at my last challenge which gives me a wasted year.
Why can't i ever think about these things before i give up?

I should focus on the positives though. My food is ok, my exercise is done and i just need a couple of glasses more water. Worry about tomorrow (and the next 20-24 weeks) when i am living them.


xoxo
Louise

Four Months????

Ouch.
I didn't realise it had been 4 months since my last blog. Bad girl.


What to say, what to say................................. Nothing good. I really have been a bad girl.
As of this moment i haven't stepped foot in the gym for a month. I should've known that not checking in everyday could lead to that happening. It started of as an excuse as i also started studying 4 weeks ago to try and get some qualifications which may one day lead to my first job (yayyy)
My excuse was that there was my course day, and then my shopping day, and then hump day - which for the past 3 months i have been taking off, and my hubby uses the car for work on Mondays.....................One thing after another and they are ALL excuses!, and BS ones at that.
Once the kids start back at school i will need to push myself to get back in the gym. I feel really disgusting in my own body because it has been neglected.

Food i hear you say?
Well thats worse than ever too. Some times - and i do stress SOME times, i manage to eat healthily and have a good day, but i seem to have developed an addiction to binging (a problem i didn't suffer too much with before). The word No has disappeared from my vocab. I was managing to keep my food at least 75-25 in favour of good eating when i went to the gym but now it's reversed. I feel like crap. I constantly feel bloated and dirty and..........................................................................................................
Urghhhhh.

I need to get back on track. I plan on paying for at least the first years membership when CK finally goes paid. (how the site turns out will determine if i pay for subsequent years).
I need to get things moving again so that i don't waste my money dithering about


Now for the numbers. It seems - depending on the day that i have put on 7 - 10kg. As for clothing sizes....the last time i was doing the right thing was the end of my 6 week challenge and i managed to fit into a size 20 - just. I am again a size 22, and only just at that. My clothing is definitely on the tight size.

Anyway. I need all the buttkicks you can send my way, and the 2 places to start are my water consumption and planning.

xoxo

mojo

~Do you choose to simply know the path, or do you choose to walk it?
~ (I don't know)

Crap!

:(  I've given up. 

I've been trying to deny it but it's true. Now i just have to find my path again. At least i'm searching...........................................................................................................................................

(which is better than what i've been doing up until now)